


I'm Good With Who We Are

by NaughtyPastryChef



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Sam, Dirty Talk, Episode 300 coda, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Neck Kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-12
Packaged: 2019-10-27 03:51:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17759270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaughtyPastryChef/pseuds/NaughtyPastryChef
Summary: coda for episode 300, ignoring the last few seconds.Dean is good with who he is. He knows who he is. He's good with who Sam is. So where does that leave them?





	I'm Good With Who We Are

It started at the bittersweet family dinner. A tickle on the back of Sam’s neck. At first he assumed that being in front of John again was making him hyper aware of how long his hair was but it didn’t feel quite right. The touch was soothing and rhythmic. When Mom, Dad and Dean were laughing he took a second to glance over and that’s when he saw it; Dean’s arm was draped along the back of his chair. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t noticed the weight of Dean’s forearm along his shoulders. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath when he realized that the tickle he was feeling was in fact, Dean’s thumb stroking up and down his neck along his spine. He put it out of his mind as best he could, keeping the warm feeling in the pit of his stomach to himself, and made no move that would let Dean know he’d noticed or cause him to stop. 

They didn’t touch much anymore. There used to be the occasional hug, clap on the back, sometimes even a friendly punch in the shoulder or the occasional sparring match. People living in the bunker combined with constantly preparing for the next apocalypse had out a stop to even the smallest touch. Without realizing, Sam found himself leaning back into that light, barely there touch. If he hadn’t been listening so intently, he would have missed the way Dean’s breath stopped briefly before kicking back up and the touch becoming more firm.The next hour was a blur of heartache, easier to manage only because Dean didn’t move further than a finger’s-width away again. 

When the pearl was smashed and their mom retired to the room she’d claimed for herself, Dean swung around to stand in front of him and catch his eye.

Both of them had puffy, tired eyes with tears still near the surface. This time when Dean reached out he made his intent clear. He patted Sam’s cheek before slipping his hand down to the side of his neck. It was still sore from the grace choke from Zachariah and the physical choke from Cass, but he tilted his chin up and leant into the warmth of Dean’s hand.

“Sammy.”’Dean’s voice was rough with unshed tears.

“Dean.” He didn’t know what Dean was thinking, what he wanted to do. Sam Just knew that he wanted to be close to his brother.

“I don’t… I don’t wanna be alone.” Sam blinked and tilted his head to the side, trying to puzzle out what Dean was saying. “You wanna stay up? Have another drink?” The strangest look came over Dean’s face when Sam asked. There was a slight smile on his swollen lips, and his eyes darkened.

“No, I really don’t. Come with me?” Sam nodded and let his brother slide a hand down his arm till his strong, thick fingers wrapped around Sam’s wrist and tugged him along.

Same stumbled after his brother, not knowing where they were going or even what was going on, till they reached the door to Dean’s bedroom.

“This okay?” Dean asked softly, pushing the door open but not making any move inside until Sam nodded. Dean’s hand slipped down till he was holding Sam’s hand, his own thumb stroking back and forth across Sam’s palm. He shut the door once Sam was over the threshold and Sam had to shake his head again to clear it. 

There had been times over the years he thought it would happen, moments where he saw his own desires reflected on Dean’s face, but the moment was always shattered. None of Dean’s touches tonight had been remotely sexual, yet Sam’s dick was chubbed in his jeans, his nipples tight and his breath quick with desire, as though they’d been engaging in foreplay.

Dean turned to face him, laying his hand on the side of Sam’s neck again, fingertips stroking up and down. Sam closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, but only for a moment. When he Dean’s thumb, feather light, run over his Adam’s apple, he opened his eyes. 

“Why do you keep doing that?” he asked, trying to keep the deep emotion he felt out of his voice, but clearly failing as Dean’s eyes fell to his hand and shuttered, cutting off the emotion he’d seen in them.

“You ever notice that when we’re in a fight, whoever we’re fightin’ always goes for your neck?” Dean asked softly, his fingers resuming their soft up and down motion.

Truthfully, Sam knew he got choked more than the average guy, but he didn’t realize it was every fight. He said as much to Dean.

“Since you had that giant growth spurt at 16. I noticed. I noticed every time. And every time I wanted to do this. To get their touches off you. To make you forget about it.” Steadily but slowly, Dean leaned closer and closer. Sam felt his heart kick in double time, thinking Dean was going in for a kiss. He was, but a different one than Sam expected. Dean placed the softest, most tantalizing kiss on Sam’s throat, just underneath his chin.

Sam couldn’t have stopped the noise he made, a groan so deep he could feel his throat vibrate with the force of his vocal chords, any more than he could stop loving his beautiful, infuriating, brilliant older brother.

“Now? Why now? Why today?” He could feel the wound on the top of his nose throb in pain and the skin beneath his eyes pull from the dried tears he’d shed not an hour before.

“I’m good with who i am. I’m good with who you are. I know who we are, and I’m too damn old to want to change it. I’m sick of fighting it Sammy, of losing the moment. No more wasted time.” Sam heard the repetition from earlier in the kitchen and he loved it. He treasured Dean’s words; Dean being good with who he was and who Sam was had been what Sam wanted for years.

Dean’s hand was back on the side of his neck, pulling gently so that Sam would tilt his head down for them to kiss. Dean’s kiss was gentle, almost hesitant, and totally unexpected. Sam didn’t hate it, but he knew they could do better.  He wanted to push forward, to take, to claim what had been his for his whole life, but he paused. He pulled back and ignored the flash of hurt he saw in Dean’s eyes. He grinned, spun them around and shoved Dean down onto his bed, laughing as Dean sprawled like a starfish over the memory foam mattress.

“Sammy what-“ Dean started but Sam didn’t give him a chance to go farther, stripping off his shirt and lowering himself down between Dean’s legs.

“Look, Dean, I love that you wanna be all sweet and smooth and gentle but let’s be honest here, I’ve wanted this since I realized watching you with Rhonda Hurley was turning me on more than watching her. So can we do this before the next freaking interruption and save the gentle kisses for the afterglow?” Sam ran his hands up Dean’s thighs, ending with them framing but not touching the obvious bulge of Dean’s cock in his indecently right jeans.

“Rhonda…. Hurley… Sam you were fifteen.” Dean gasped, twisting his hips to get Sam to move his hands and touch his cock, but Sam wouldn’t budge, yet.

“And you were pretty in pink. That’s a kink we can revisit later, now, I think you and I have unfinished business.” Sam leaned down and opened his mouth, blowing his  hot breath over Dean’s cock. It twitched and filled visibly through his jeans and Dean gasped.

“I want this, I have for years. I’m not letting another chance to have it, have YOU, slip through my fingers because we cuddled first.” Sam tucked his fingertips under the waistband of Dean’s jeans and tugged. “Off? Or do you wanna go back to the foreplay?”

Dean sat up to a sitting position, yanking his shirts off over his head and tossing them to the floor before he curled a hand around Sam’s neck and yanked him up the bed, till they were lying chest to chest. He pulled Sam’s head down to kiss him again, but this time there was nothing hesitant or gentle about it. This was a bruising, biting, claiming kiss. This is what Sam expected and what he wanted for their first time.

“Fuck Sammy, the things you do to me.” Dean grunted against Sam’s ear as he lay a line of smeared kisses across Sam’s cheek and down his jawline.

For his part, Sam was fumbling with the button and zip on both their pants, and having a hard enough time concentrating on getting it done without injuring anyone. “I’m gonna do more things to you if I can get our fucking pants off.” Dean made an aborted move to roll away, presumably to pull of his own pants but Sam grabbed his hip hard.

“No.” He glared at Dean till his brother raised a hand in mock surrender. He lay back across the pillows, one arm now folded beneath his head and grinned, that lazy sexy grin Sam had seen countless times before; the one that never failed to made his blood rush in his ears whether it was directed at him or not.

Frustrated with the suddenly impossibly complicated pants, Sam growled, shifting down the bed and began to yank at the waistband. “Whoa, Sammy, careful there. You damage the goods were aren’t going to be having much fun tonight. And my dick tends to hold a grudge.” Dean laughed even as he lifted his hips to help shimmy out of his jeans. They joined the growing heap of clothes on the floor beside the bed and Sam ducked down, running the tip of his nose along the length of Dean’s cock in his boxers.

“Fuck, Sammy.” Sam lifted his eyes to meet Dean’s but his head was thrown back and his eyes were squeezed shut in pleasure.

“That’s right. Good plan. So smart, big brother.” Sam grunted, shoving his own pants and underwear down his legs and to the floor. “Lube? C’mon, I know you’ve got lube in here.” Dean twisted to reach the bedside table and pull open the drawer, grabbing a bottle and box of condoms and tossing them down towards Sam at the foot of the bed.

Sam picked up the box and sat up straight, nudging Dean’s leg with his knee in the process so that he would look at him. 

“You ever done it bare? With anyone?” As he asked he popped open the cap on the lube and spread some on his fingers, reaching behind himself to start opening up.

“No glove no love. The only sex talk I got from - “ Dean cut himself off, swallowing hard, the reminder of what happened that evening all coming back in a rush. Sam pulled his fingers out and wiped them on the sheets beside Dean’s hip before clamoring up the bed. He spread his legs wide and sat back so Dean’s cock would slot between his cheeks, before grabbing Dean's hands and bringing them back up towards his neck.

“Same talk you gave me, huh?” Sam uncurled Dean’s fingers and directed him to place them on either side of his neck. “Make me forget, wasn’t that the plan, big brother?” Dean stroked his fingertips up and down Sam’s neck, clearly intent on making him lose his mind. He leaned down for a kiss, their tongues meeting hungrily in mid air before their lips touched. Dean’s fingers moved, stroking across his neck and Sam shivered, biting into Dean’s mouth more hungrily. He pulled back when he realized he’d been rubbing his leaking cock across Dean’s stomach, humping him in hopes for some release.

“With us, only bare. Only us from now on.” Sam whispered before he grabbed the lube and reached behind him to slick up Dean’s cock. He cursed when he realized Dean was still wearing his boxers, causing a momentary laugh from his brother. Sam pretzel twisted himself around, pulling off Dean’s boxers in the process before re-mounting his brother and gripping his iron-hard dick. He wasted no more time, Dean’s fingers thrumming across his neck once again and threatening to distract him. He gripped Dean’s cock in his hand and pressed the head to his underprepared hole.

“Sammy.” His name held wonder and love and caution when Dean spoke, but it still wasn’t enough to stop him. He lifted up on his knees and sank down, feeling the burn and stretch of Dean’s big cock inside him. He tucked his chin to his chest, hair hanging across his face to cover his wince as he sank all the way down till his ass touched Dean’s pelvis. Only then did he stop to let his body adjust.

Dean made a small, hurt noise in the back of his throat and his hands slipped down off Sam’s neck, over his shoulders and under his arms to wrap around his back. He pulled Sam forward, angling his face closer.

“Next time, I’m going to take my time with you. I’m going to open you up with my tongue till you beg me, little brother, and then I'm going to use my fingers.” Dean husked at him. He continued his litany of things he’d been thinking about doing to Sam and Sam allowed himself to get lost in the sound of Dean’s sex voice and the words he was saying. Soon, he was swiveling his hips in tight figure-eight motions and both of their breaths were becoming ragged. Dean pushed the hair away from Sam’s face and tugged him down for another fierce kiss before shoving him away.

“Ride away little brother. Show me what I’ve been missing out on. Hot body like yours, fuck, I can’t even imagine all the ways we can do this.” Sam tucked his heels underneath himself and used his thighs to lift up and almost all the way off, before dropping down hard, punching the air out of both their lungs. He picked up a punishing rhythm, Dean helping him along by lifting his hips as Sam came back down. 

Dean brought one hand up to stroke along Sam’s neck and the other went to his cock. Dean curled his palm around the bouncing head of Sam’s cock and grunted out his name. Sam looked up, sweaty and crazed and chasing his orgasm into the green eyes of the only person he’d ever truly loved.

“Come for me, little brother.” Sam could no more ignore the order than he could stop his hips from moving. His head snapped back and his thigh muscles tightened and clenched as he came into Dean’s waiting hand. He never stopped moving throughout, extending his orgasm and trying to tease Dean’s from him. Finally, he slumped over Dean’s chest, feeling fingertips tickle the back of his neck and the minute motions that Dean was making with his hips, unable to stop when he was so close to his own orgasm. 

Sam trailed wet, exhausted kisses across Dean’s chest, nibbling around his nipple when he felt Dean thrust particularly hard when he tried it. “C’mon big brother. You know you want to.” He sighed into the sweaty, saliva covered skin next to his mouth. The next thing he knew, he was flipped over onto his back and Dean was crouched between his spread thighs.

“Yeah, I do.” Dean grunted, shoving his cock back into Sam’s empty hole and fucking in and out powerfully. Sam tilted his head back into the mattress and exposed his neck to Dean’s lips. He felt his brother kiss and lick but never bite at the soft skin of his throat as he nearly brutally worked his cock in and out. Sam slid his hand down Dean’s sweaty back and trailed one fingertip between his cheeks and that was all his brother could take.

Dean pushed all the way in and froze, groaning as he emptied himself into Sam. Sam felt his cock try to thicken at the feel of Dean’s hot, sticky release filling him up but he wasn’t as young as he used to be and the feeling simply remained a pleasant buzz under his skin.

Later, they lay twined around each other on Dean’s memory foam mattress, breathing the same air, when Dean began to stroke his fingertips over Sam’s neck again. He leaned forward and Sam tipped his head back to let his brother lay a ring of soft kisses along the base of his throat.

“Property of Dean Winchester?” Sam asked with gravel in his voice; he rather liked the idea of Dean’s mark on him permanently.

“Damn straight.” Dean answered then promptly snorted out a laugh. “Though there ain't nothin’ straight about the things I’m thinkin about little brother.”

Sam felt a thrum through his whole body at the proclamation.

“No freak out or morning take backs?”

“Nah. I’m good with us. No more wasted moments.”

**Author's Note:**

> It felt good to write this and, since I"m ignoring what happened in the last 10? seconds of the show anyway, this is what happened after, dangit.  
> Much love and thanks to Soy-Em for the beta (all remaining mistakes are my own) and the encouragement as well as the brainstorming.  
> Let me know what you think! Kudos and comments may not pay my bills, but it sure helps my state of mind!


End file.
